Around mid-June, I caught myself rethinking my upcoming birthday. Traditionally, I celebrate in a very specific way: I disappear into a spa for the entire day and let myself be pampered from head to toe. It’s the one day each year when I don’t second-guess my bank account or rationalize indulgence. Massage? Make it two hours. Facial? Add microdermabrasion. Manicure and pedicure? Yes—and let’s upgrade to the hot stone option. A “no phone” rule? Absolutely. And champagne before the steam room? Don’t mind if I do.
After a day of pure bliss, my fiancé usually sweeps me off to one of my favorite restaurants for dinner, followed by late-night drinks. We toast to another year of life, make promises for the months ahead, and laugh until our cheeks hurt. The next morning always starts with flowers, coffee, and a slight headache—thanks to splitting a bottle of sake we swore we’d “never” order again. “We won’t be able to do this when we’re 80,” he teases. “Of course we will,” I insist.
Those little rituals—indulgence, laughter, and late-night storytelling—have become more meaningful over time. Which is why this year, in the middle of yet another round of lockdowns in South Florida, the question hit me: How do you celebrate a birthday in quarantine?
“Tacos and wine at home?” my fiancé offered.
I’ll admit it—I sulked at first. Another taco night during quarantine wasn’t exactly the celebration I had envisioned. But after I accepted it, the disappointment melted away. Much like postponing our wedding earlier this year, I reminded myself that there are far greater hardships in the world right now than rethinking a birthday. I have my health, my family, my job. And honestly, that’s everything.
Then came an idea that instantly lifted my spirits: “What about a virtual karaoke night with your best friends?” Yes, please.
Why Experiences Matter More Than Things
The truth is, I’ve always leaned toward experiences over material gifts. Studies back this up: the thrill of buying something new fades quickly, while memories tied to experiences stick with us for years—sometimes forever. A night filled with laughter, a trip that shifts your perspective, or even the quiet joy of sharing a homemade meal can enrich life in a way a new handbag simply can’t.
I think about the years when I didn’t have much at all. Back then, a spa day wasn’t in the budget. So I created my own version: I’d dim all the lights in my tiny apartment, light a dozen candles, crack the bathroom window, and soak in the tub while music played softly in the background. Somehow, the chipped paint, noisy neighbors, and stress of the day faded away. Those quiet nights taught me that joy doesn’t have to come with a hefty price tag—it’s often in the simplest details.
Creative Ways to Celebrate at Home
So, for anyone else trying to make a birthday feel special in the midst of uncertainty, here are a few ideas I’ve been toying with:
1. Bake a cake.
Whether you’re a master baker or the type to burn toast, there’s joy in rolling up your sleeves and creating something—messy frosting and all. The laughter (and sugar rush) might just be the highlight of your day.
2. Host a “BYOW” video call.
Bring Your Own Wine. Invite friends and family to join virtually, light candles, blow out the cake together, and maybe even break into a round of karaoke.
3. Learn something new.
Gift yourself an online class. Interior design, cooking, writing—there are so many creative courses out there that not only spark inspiration but also give you something meaningful to carry forward.
4. Have a picnic.
It doesn’t have to be fancy. Pack your favorite meal (takeout counts!) and savor it outside. Sometimes, a change of scenery is the best gift.
5. Foster a puppy.
Admittedly, this one tempts me every year, but I know myself too well—I’d want to keep them all. Still, for those stronger than me, what better way to spend a birthday than with wagging tails and puppy cuddles?
6. Refresh your space.
No, not with a new sofa. Instead, think about how your home makes you feel. A fresh coat of paint, a small corner redesigned for morning coffee, or a new plant can shift the entire mood of your space.
7. Give back.
Sometimes the most fulfilling celebrations come from generosity. Leave a kind note, give an extra tip, or support a cause you care about. Brightening someone else’s day has a way of making your own shine even more.
A Different Kind of Birthday
Yes, this year feels different—strange, even. But different doesn’t mean bad. Maybe it’s a reminder that birthdays aren’t about extravagant dinners or champagne in the steam room. They’re about presence. Gratitude. Laughter. And creating new memories, however unconventional they may look.
So, to my fellow July babies celebrating in unusual circumstances: may your day be full of love, joy, and maybe even a little silliness. May you find yourself laughing at frosting gone wrong, singing off-key with friends over Zoom, or basking in the sunlight during a simple picnic.
Here’s to experiences, to resilience, and to celebrating life—even when it doesn’t look the way we imagined. After all, isn’t that what birthdays are really about?